Friday 31 July 2009

Who Draws The Lines?

Keir Starmer was born in 1962. He has just been asked to become God.

The Law Lords, in their final action before morphing into a supreme court (I suspect they wanted to go out with a bang- they did!) have ruled that The Director of Public Prosecutions (DPP) – the aforementioned Mr Starmer – must publish guidelines on prosecuting those who help others to die.

This has come about through the campaigning of Debbie Purdy, a multiple sclerosis sufferer. She wanted to be sure her husband would not be prosecuted if he were to help her die when the disease got worse. The thing is, she knows he won’t….

The DPP have trodden a careful line on what they will and will not do as regards such prosecutions. Of the over 100 cases of British assisted suicides at the Dignitas clinic in Switzerland, no friend or family member has been prosecuted. This is sensible. There is no need to add pain to grief. But it doesn’t make it right, and that is why the DPP have been careful not to say anything either way- until now.

Much as everyone can sympathise with Debbie Purdy and the dreadful illness she has to carry, it’s important to note she is also a member of the Voluntary Euthanasia Society, an organisation keen to promote euthanasia (dictionary definition: The act or practice of ending the life of an individual suffering from a terminal illness or an incurable condition). So what was the real motive in appealing to the Law Lords?

Keir Starmer has a problem. He is not God. The moment he responds to the Law Lords and sets out a practice to be followed, he either has to prosecute cases or open the door for what one newspaper described as ‘decriminalised suicide tourism’.

So who draws the lines? One woman’s freedom to choose the time of her death may be a future child’s moment of condemnation. Does a Downs Syndrome child not deserve to laugh? Does a paraplegic accident victim not deserve to love? Does a mentally disabled schoolboy not deserve to breathe? Who can possibly make these decisions?

In matters of life and death, only God can draw the lines.

Saturday 25 July 2009

The Customer Gets Even

British Gas owes me £186. They say it’s their service contractor Siemens that need to pay. Siemens say it’s British Gas. Over a year later, I am no nearer getting anywhere. For all those that feel they can never win against the big corporations, here’s a story to warm the heart….

Dave Carroll is a singer with the band Sons of Maxwell. He actually saw United Airlines employees throwing his guitar around. Needless to say, it was broken when he got to the other end of the flight. United Airlines refused to listen. A year later they still wouldn’t pay up. So Dave Carroll wrote a song and posted it on You Tube. To date it has had over four million hits. The story has featured in newspapers around the world and has headlined on tv news in the States. Rather late in the day, United Airlines decided to apologise….

Now, anyone want to write a song about British Gas?!

Here’s ‘United Breaks Guitars’ by Dave Carroll:

Tuesday 21 July 2009

Summer classes for men

Thanks to Mark Griffiths for sending me this!

Summer Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTRE

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Monday August 10, 2009
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays - Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll - Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is it Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?
Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between the Laundry Basket and The Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Dinner Dishes - Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity - Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things - Starting With Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch - Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost - Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations..
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live - Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy - Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries
and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven - What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Sunday 12 July 2009

Pure Heart, Clear Head, Steady Hand

'We stay at our posts, alertly, unswervingly… in hard times, tough times, bad times….. working hard, working late…. With pure heart, clear head, steady hand.'

Paul writing to the Corinthian Church (2 Corinthians 6: 4-5, Message Version)

Friday 3 July 2009

In the Arena

"It is not the critic who counts. Not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause. Who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

Theodore Roosevelt